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Sunday 11 December 2016

Honesty with Love

I was pondering the other day how often I hide my feelings and don't say how I truly feel, because I'm too afraid of offending someone. Nowadays, it seems no-one cares to listen to the honest to goodness truth, either about ourselves or about a situation in our lives. I think of the verses in Proverbs 27:5-6 that reminds us that a loving correction from a friend can be trusted more than a silent so-called friend. 
Yes, sometimes the truth can hurt, but at least we will have something to work with in order to fix it.  You cannot solve a problem, if you don't know of its existence. 
It rakes courage to be honest and wisdom to admit our faults, but we can never live truly authentic lives, if we fail to be honest, both with ourselves and with others.
In retrospect, I've realised how often I've not been a true friend and have kept my mouth shut, when I should have spoken up, or even worse, I've said what I knew the other person wanted to hear... and for that I seek forgiveness. 
When I use to work at Wesbank, our department did an internal project called 'Recommendations for Improvemnt'.  We had to evaluate our and other people's jobs and see how we can improve them in doing them better.  I guess this project has to get all the credit in helping me to see that ALL criticism is really just a recommendation for improvement!  
We need to welcome correction from a friend and reject false, and fake ones who don't love us enough to tell us the truth.  And we need to be truer friends in always telling the truth to them. 
Yes, the truth can and does often hurt, but it is sorely needed and should be encouraged.   As long as it is said out of love and with the right motive, we need not fear. 
So to all my family, friends and bosses, I must warn you that my 2017 New Years Resolution is to be a lot more honest, and may God help me to receive honesty from all of you without taking offence...